Marlena Gershowitz of Southampton Dies September 26

Marlena Gershowitz of Southampton died on September 26. She was 79

She is remembered as a loving wife, mother, grandmother and sister who dedicated her life and her heart to her family. She also welcomed into the family her children’s spouses, who called her “mom,” with a warm heart and open arms and truly loved them as her own.

Gershowitz’s passing occurred on the second night of Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. According to Jewish tradition, a person who dies on Rosh Hashanah is a tzaddik, a person of great righteousness.

She was born Marlena Lederman on October 10, 1942, in Brooklyn, to Herman and Jeanne Lederman. Education was instilled as a core value in her home. After graduating from the University of Miami in Florida, she entered the teaching profession as an elementary school teacher in the New York City public school system in Jamaica, Queens.

Her daughter, Pamela Abrams, said both her mother and grandmother were strong advocates for women and the pursuit of education. “My mother’s devotion to education and her love for teaching encouraged me in my own decision to become a teacher and reading specialist,” she said.

Sam Gershowitz — who was starting his own scrap metal recycling business known as Gershow Recycling and opened his first location in Central Islip — met her in the spring of 1966 at the Manhattan club Mister Laffs. For him, it was love at first sight. Despite them being polar opposites — she was a college graduate, he was a high school dropout — they embarked on the beginning of a love story that bound them for more than 50 years.

They dated throughout the summer and enjoyed their time together going to clubs in the city and driving out to Montauk, where he enjoyed fishing. They were engaged during the fall of 1966 and married on New Year’s Day 1967.

Her husband recalled her walking him to the garage every morning and giving him a kiss before he left for work. When he came home as late as midnight, she would still have dinner waiting for him. “As an avid fisherman, I have made a lot of big catches, but never a bigger catch than my Marlena,” he said.

The couple moved into an apartment in Jericho. Later that year, she learned she was expecting, but she did not know that she was carrying twins until December 1967, when she gave birth to two boys, Kevin and Elliot. From then on, she focused on raising her children. The following year, they bought a house in Dix Hills, and, in May 1972, she gave birth to a daughter, Pamela. They later took residence in East Islip, then in Southampton.

The marriage was a true partnership. She was his constant companion, voice and advisor. She was also CEO of the household while he was the CEO of his company. She put her teaching skills to good use, not only for her children, but also for the next generation. She often babysat for her grandchildren and attended their school functions and graduations. She took much pleasure in all her children and grandchildren’s achievements.

Family was the most important to Gershowitz, a role she filled to a T. “She was a teacher, a sounding board, a life ring, a referee and a mentor,” her son Elliot said. “Mom would always say, ‘The family must stick together.’”

“My mother was an architect — an architect of the family,” said her son Kevin. “She guided all my important decisions, and all my good qualities came from her.”

Pamela Abrams, her daughter, said, “Not only was she my mother, but she was my advisor and my best friend. As mothers and daughters, we are connected with one another. My mother is the bones of my spine. I cannot imagine a life without her.”

Gershowitz was very philanthropic and active in the Hamptons community. She was a member and volunteer with the Chabad of Southampton Jewish Center and Hadassah. In 2012, she and her husband were honored by the Montauk Playhouse Community Center Foundation for their generosity at the Diamond in the Rough Gala. She was also a major donor to the Montauk Medical Center.

Later in life, Gershowitz pursued a passion for interior design, decorating their homes and her husband’s luxury fishing yacht, the Marlena. She took joy in helping her children decorate their own homes, and their spouses welcomed her expertise and advice.

A key aspect of keeping the family strong was the family vacations that Gershowitz organized, as well as the dinners she meticulously planned for Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, birthdays, and the Jewish holidays. For Gershowitz, time with family and friends was precious, which is also evident in her childhood friendships that she maintained for over 70 years.

She is survived by her beloved husband of 55 years, Sam Gershowitz; her loving children Kevin, Elliot and Pamela (Abrams); their spouses Marnie, Wendy and Jonathan (Abrams); her 13 grandchildren, Jared, Emily, Max, Rachel and Jackie Gershowitz of Melville, Alexander Gershowitz of Patchogue, Mallorie Gershowitz of Farmingdale, Hannah and Emma Sutkin of Melville, Jessica, Andrew, Gabriella and Laurence Abrams of Dix Hills; as well as her brother, Ted Lederman, and his wife, Syma, both of East Hampton, along with many nieces and nephews.

Services were held on September 30 at Gutterman’s Funeral Home. The burial took place at Wellwood Cemetery.