You Might Break a Nail

As pickleball continues to grow at astronomical speed, there always has to be someone who needs to pull in the reins and rain on the parade a little.

Last month, an article in The New York Times, “Pickleball, Sport of the Future Injury,” gave a bleak account of the horrible injuries that could occur while playing this fun, social sport: back pain, Achilles tendon strains, tennis elbow, sore shoulders, tripping and falling.

After reading the article, I wondered why anyone would ever return to the court. You’re taking your life in your hands playing this dangerous game! Beware!

So, I did a little research, and asked the Google gods to provide me with some data from other activities that seniors partake in. You’ll never want to go into your garden again.

Let’s start with golf. In addition to the same injuries that can happen in pickleball, such as back pain, elbow tendinitis, rotator cuff and wrist injuries, the big one for me was shocking: In a 10-year period ending in 2018, there were over 65,000 serious golf cart injuries — 65,000!

Talk about taking your life in your hands to chase a small white ball around. I’ll never play golf again.

Bowling is a senior sport that has been enjoyed since the 1950s, and the list of injuries compare to pickleball: elbow tendinitis, annular ligament sprain, shoulder instability and MCL knee issues. Plus, you probably will be wearing a pair of smelly shoes that are shared among thousands of players. Add the four or five beers you’ll have and … is this really a healthy activity? I’ll never bowl again.

Any gardeners out there? I’ll never trim a hedge or prune a tree again. The numbers are staggering for the missing digits that home landscapers lop off yearly. Add the enormous back pain from bending over and weeding, carpal tunnel syndrome, and the occasional pebble that hits you in the eyes while weed whacking, and here’s another very dangerous activity I’m never doing again.

Fishing — who thought this could be dangerous? Keep casting that line and you’ll get tennis elbow, rotator cuff and ligament tears. Ever fall out of a boat? And let’s not forget the wonderful experience of taking a pair of pliers and extracting a hook from your own mouth. Fishing — never again.

Hiking has 5,000 injuries a year. Let’s go for a walk while looking at our cellphone — that’s a safe activity. Ever fall off a cliff? Tuck and roll. No more walks for me.

And, finally, tennis. Just put in all of the above strains, tendinitis, ligament damage and, of course, the topper for me, tennis toe. Add the occasional volley to the face or eyes. Why bother playing?

Let’s face it: We should all just sit around, never go out and exercise on any level, and become large sloth-like creatures, because there is a risk of injury.

There will always be a risk of injury in any enjoyable leisure activity.

Get up, get out and get active. Take the risk.